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A picture of the city of chicago, right outside the chicago theater

Welcome to the Halls of Patent Medicine. Back before the regulation of food and drugs in the United States, almost anyone could make a concoction, claim it was medicine and sell it over the counter without a doctor’s prescription (1). This led to predictable results, with all sorts of items being sold for their “medicinal properties.” The history of patent medicine is a treasure trove of outrageous marketing, dubious deals and suspicious substances. So with that in mind, let’s take a look at something from my hometown of Chicago. 

Chicago’s finest sewer water (2). Pencil Shavings and Heartbreak (3). Soapy Dirty Dishwater (3). All of these descriptors have been applied to Jeppson’s Malört, a hard liquor created in Chicago back in the 1920’s. Known for its distinctive taste, the drink is considered a staple of Chicago. And like some other beverages on the market, Jeppson’s Malört began as a medicine, not as an alcoholic beverage.

Well, at least its inventor claimed it was a medicine (4). During Prohibition, a Swedish immigrant by the name of Carl Jeppson created the beverage (wine). He began selling it to those interested in buying, and given the lack of legally available liquor, the beverage had interested buyers. According to legend, the terrible taste was part of the reason Jeppson was able to sell it; when questioned by the cops, Jeppson told them to try it, and after one shot, they’d agree that nobody would drink something so terrible for fun (4). 

But what was Jeppson’s supposed to treat anyway? Stomach worms and parasites, apparently (3). While it likely didn’t have any impact on hypothetical parasites, that wouldn’t cause any problems given lack of regulation of drugs at the time. While the drink came out after the Golden Era of Patent (an era where patent medicines boomed in sales), it would slip through before the passage of the Food Drug and Cosmetic Act, allowing Jeppson to sell his concoction despite his dubious claims (1). 

After Prohibition ended, Jeppson sold his formula. Later, it would be popularized in the late 2000’s by a local bartender, and become the iconic drink of Chicagoland. While you can purchase it outside of the city these days, it might be best to hold off unless you want to try the taste of “pencil shavings and heartbreak” for yourself. 

1. Smithsonian. Balm of America: Patent Medicine Collection. Smithsonian Institution. Accessed July 25, 2024. https://www.si.edu/spotlight/balm-of-america-patent-medicine-collection/history

2. Schnitzler N. Check Out This Documentary On Malört, The Spirit That’s Proud To Be Undrinkable. Food Republic. Published April 21, 2015. Accessed July 25, 2024. https://www.foodrepublic.com/2015/04/21/check-oDow C. Jeppson’s Malört - A Brief Education. Real Food Traveler. Published November 12, 2019. Accessed July 25, 2024. https://www.realfoodtraveler.com/jeppsons-malort-a-brief-educationut-this-documentary-on-malort-the-spirit-thats-proud-to-be-undrinkable/

3. Dow C. Jeppson’s Malört - A Brief Education. Real Food Traveler. Published November 12, 2019. Accessed July 25, 2024. https://www.realfoodtraveler.com/jeppsons-malort-a-brief-education/

4 John W. Chicago’s Malört Liqueur Is Both Off-Putting and Excellent. Food & Wine. Accessed July 25, 2024. https://www.foodandwine.com/travel/history-of-malort-chicago-novelty-liquor