By ltchouaffe
People always say that you never know who you are or how you will act until you get yourself in a situation or environment that tests that. I truly think that goes the same for identity. You never know who you are until you go to a country that is different from yours in every single way. It is there that you will truly think about what makes up you and why you are the way you are.
In America, there is huge emphasis on diversity and knowing where your family comes from. One may be like me, whose parents came to America in the 90s and therefore directly knows and is impacted by their culture. And then you have those who are third and fourth generation American but still proudly call themselves Irish, for example. You may be American but you are a certain type of American.
In France, for the most part that is not true. Once you are French citizen, you are French. It doesn’t matter if your family has lived in France for six generations or just arrived ten years ago, If you have a French citizenship that is it and nothing more.
This idea in the American community has its pro and cons. For one thing, America prides itself in the plethora of cultures and identities that make up the fifty states. Afterall, at the end of the day no matter what one may say, the America that we know, is made up of immigrants from around the world who come to its shores for many reasons. Even in various communities such as schools, we celebrate cultural days. In my own personal community, the fact that I am Cameroonian-American has been something looked greatly upon and something that I should always be encouraged to embrace.
However I was never just American but always Cameroonian- American. There was always an emphasis that I am American but American and something else. And because of this emphasis, I’ve always held my Cameroonian-ness above my American-ness. I didn’t care to be American. Being American was always boring and the norm. In my mind there was nothing unique and amazing about being American.
Coming to my new host community of France has made me think differently about that. It doesn't matter where I go, I’m seen as American. It's interesting how me saying I’m Cameroonian-American doesn't mean anything. All they see is one or the other but never both. I can explain that my parents moved here in the 90s or how my extended family live in Cameroon and it would not matter one bit. The minute I say that I was born and raised in the United States, nothing else matters but that.
During the Easter weekend, I went down to Paris to visit my grandparents and cousins that live there. One day, I was out with my cousin at the grocery store and we met a guy who heard us speaking English. My cousin and the guy struck up a conversation and asked where we were from. My cousin then proceeded to tell him that he was French. This immediately struck a chord in my mind. Yes, my cousin has French citizenship and a yes he has lived in France since the beginning of his adult life but he was born and raised and educated in Cameroon. I felt that if this scenario took place in America, he would have said I am Cameroonian even if he did have an American citizenship.
All this has made me appreciate being American though. Here in France, I am American and nothing more and that has made me look deeper as to who I am. Americans do have there own culture and things that make them different from the rest of the world, just as France or Cameroon does. The way I view myself has been challenged in a way that I never thought would. One of the reasons I came to France was to learn more about my Francophone identity but here and now, I am learning that I am American too.