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3 Months In

By chrisbohorquez

I am about to hit the three month mark on my study abroad experience and I can safely say that I have become a better person because of it. At GW, as great as it is, one can feel like a plankton in the entire Atlantic ocean; simply being in a smaller group has allowed me to expand the exploration of my identity. Even before coming to Paris I knew that I was adventurous; a cautious risk-taker, a pragmatist-- these thoughts have been reinforced by my community through the challenges/opportunities that have been presented to me. For example, every other weekend, some friends and I open a map of Europe and randomly point to a city which we will then proceed to jump on train to with our EURail pass. This method of travelling has taken me to day-trips in Berlin, a weekend in Poland and a week in Venice. This, of course, is done during days where classes are not held.

Yes, I still think of myself as adventurous and spontaneous, but I do admit that prior to coming to Paris I second, third and fourth guessed myself before making a decision; weighing the pros and cons, making lists, planning, etc. (did that ever actually make me spontaneous?) Anyway-- this came from a place where I was either guilty or afraid of being a kid and doing things that might not make practical sense. I come from a family of blue-collar workers, and my parents' only wish is that I fulfill my wishes and desires because they couldnt. That is what I am realizing whilst abroad-- that this is my chance to make up for the chances my parents lost while working 60 hour a week manual labor jobs.
Yes, I am having a hell of a time travelling throughout Europe and seeing things that I might never be able to again, especially after this election (Lord save us all). But I am supplementing my travels by remembering that I must cherish these moments and privileges that so many people have and will never have the chance to experience.

Even today I had a burger with tomato and pickles for the first time. I used to hate tomato and pickles, now I have a moderate distaste for them. These things might seem superficial but they mean something, at least to people like me.

I am now allowing myself to be more open to things I otherwise would not even attempt. I am inching away from this middle-class-Catholic-guilt of indulgence. My identity as a old man stuck in a young mans body is supported while at the same supporting my newfound identity as a spontaneous (somewhat) carefree 20 year old. (Who still doublechecks reservations, sets alarms and prints doubles of everyone's boarding pass in case someone else loses it-- how hard is it to keep hold of a piece of paper??)

Anyway, I am discovering an entirely new part of myself on this journey and it wouldn't be without the unique group of people alongside me, the fascinating characters I discover every day on the streets of Paris, the long nights in a random arrondismont and anything that happens after I say yes when just three short months ago I would've said no.