By mahaliasmith
A couple of weeks ago, my mom came to visit me in Shanghai. When she came she said, “Look, it’s not me who’s holding your hand and guiding you along anymore, it’s you who’s holding mine.” The entirety of her stay, she kept remarking on how well she thought I could navigate the city and how generally confident I was in myself in Shanghai.
In the moment, I mostly pushed those comments aside, but as the semester comes to a close, I’m realizing that I genuinely believe I’ve accomplished a lot this semester.
The semester has been full of just about every kind of exhilarating yet humbling experience. From being chased by wild monkeys through the forest in Zhangjiajie, to summiting five of the sacred peaks in China alongside grannies in heels and Gucci track suits, kayaking down the Li River, sprinting along the Great Wall in the frigid cold and heavy snowfall, fending off relentless market vendors (and harassing a few of my own), late night cramming for term papers and exams, experiencing the variety in night life, trying the most unique and somewhat terrifying cuisines, and making friends from all over the world: Shanghai has opened my world to a plethora of new experiences.
One of my favorite parts about Shanghai is how the enormity of the city makes me feel like such a small dot in this world. Despite that, I’m no longer scared to ride the metro home alone at night or to go on my own biking expedition across the city with nothing but a GPS for navigation and my music as companionship. In fact, I’m not afraid of embarking on any other adventure in Shanghai, or China for that matter. I welcome the opportunity for new experiences in addition to the roadblocks that might arise along the way.
I am thankful for Shanghai because this new city, new community, and new home has expanded my capacity for experiencing life itself.
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Today is my 100th day in Shanghai. On one hand, the semester seems to have flown by in the blink of an eye; on the other hand, it feels like I’ve been living here for years already. It’s such an odd feeling knowing I am leaving so soon.
In just a few weeks, I will have finished school and go on to visit the place where I was found as a baby before my mom adopted me.
My entire life I have simply known I was adopted. I never really wonder about my birthplace or my biological parents because my home is in America. However, if I do happen to stumble across a fleeting moment of curiosity, I always contemplate what my life could have been like had I not been adopted.
Where am I living? What school do I attend? Do I attend school? So on and so forth. It's always an interesting thought.
But as aforementioned, my home is in America and I am American. My mom is my mom. And I am who I am today because of this. Therefore, I have never felt like I needed "closure" or needed to see my birthplace, and as such, I don’t anticipate that this experience will redefine me in my life. However, I am excited about the opportunity nonetheless.
Perhaps this trip to my former orphanage will provide me with a different perspective on that life that could have been.
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T-Minus 30 days left and I’m going to miss Shanghai oh so much.
塞翁失马，焉知非福。-- Blessings come in disguise.
