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On Goodbyes and Going Home

By squeakyrobot

Goodbye Dog

Time has this strange way of moving forward. This is a truth we’ve known for most of our lives, and yet we’re often surprised by the sheer speed of days and the fleeting quality of moment

Ever since I stepped on Russian soil, I appreciated every single moment. I appreciated the air. Every walk home. Every person who made me laugh. Every snowflake and cup of tea. Every scoop of sour cream and every ray of sunshine (they were so infrequent, you know). I had (and still have) gratitude for everything, Russian and otherwise, and this makes living great.s, as if these concepts are brand-new or unexpected.

Which makes going home not so bad. It’s not as if I have wasted my time here and took everything, every opportunity and experience, for granted. I knew from the beginning I would blink, and my time in Russia would be gone. So I was very present-oriented, and I did what I could and nothing more.

I will miss Russia and everything in Russia. I’ll miss the treacherous sidewalks and the insane drivers. I’ll miss the long escalator rides as I dash from one side of the city to the other, often late to gatherings and appointments. I’ll miss coming home and being greeting by my enthusiastic wiener dog, Gemma.  I’ll miss getting up late and seeing the sunrise. I’ll miss the friends I’ve made and the friends I didn’t get a chance to meet. This is all a roundabout way of saying that I’ll miss everything, but not in an agonizing, regretful way. I’ll miss them will a smile on my face, grateful as ever.

Preparing to go home is a simple affair: I buy some Christmas presents for family, I pack, and I say goodbye. Not much more to it.

And I’m excited to return home for two reasons: 1) to see my family. I haven’t seen them since early summer. 2) To finish school and move on with my life. And the only way to do that is to leave Russia.

Bittersweet? Maybe. I’d call it so intensely bittersweet I could cry.

I leave on December 21st, the day the world ends.  I’m not sure if the world will end, but I do know that one adventure must conclude for another one to begin.